Stay-At-Home Moms Value Undercut

Now, let me start with a disclaimer: this is not supposed to engender envy, strive, pride, or agitation with the body of Christ between moms who work outside the home and those that work inside the home.  Both are biblically permissible. And I believe that each couple has to work out their faith in fear and trembling, for this is an issue of liberty, not prescription. Neither group is supposed to flaunt its liberty.  My idealistic thinking makes me wonder how the two options could work together in beautiful harmony within a loving community of genuine followers of Christ who are committed to laying down their lives. What would that look like? So, to moms working outside the home, no condemnation, in fact, I need your help. I need you to fight against the culture and their values, not against your practice.

Anyway, the genesis of this post was two newspaper articles (I still read a newspaper, behind the times, I know...) that demonstrate the culture's view of women and their role in parenting and in society and life in general. I know that I am also biased because my wife stays home. It is our choice, we are good with it. But the culture cheapens it, so I guess this bothers me. One article was titled something to the effect of 'Stay-At-Home Mom Takes a Stand' and the other talked about how women in leadership were making a difference and truly changing the world. I am not here to wish things were the way they used to be in the 50's, or preach that they should be that way.

I am simply saying one thing: our culture does not see the role of the stay at home mom as valuable, game-changing, or at least as much as getting out there and "doing something with your life."

Want some proof? How many young ladies graduating high school stand up in their churches or at civic organizations and say that their plans for the future are to be a wife and mother. What would be the reaction of the audience? Will they burst out in applause? Standing ovation? Cheers and shouts of affirmation? They should, but the culture says that path is inferior. How many valedictorians tell their class they have focused on studying home economics (is that class even offered anymore?) so they can better make the home a wonderful refuge, and be a better wife to her husband? Do you think that anyone will EVER stand at a commencement ceremony at any university and tell the new graduates to stay at home and be great moms? What would the conversation go like if you daughter told a neighbor that her goal was to be a wife and mother? "But no, honey, what do you WANT to DO?" says the neighbor. Just today I saw a county official who congratulated all the graduates on their accomplishments and on entering a new phase of life (two options), either continuing their education or entering the workforce...whichever you choose... they continued. Case and point.

I know this example is from the 1700's, but it shows the value of a godly stay-at-home mother and wife: The legacy left by the Edwards family demonstrates the effect of a gospel-centered home. Over four hundred descendants of Jonathan and Sarah Edwards have been traced. Of these, fourteen became college presidents, roughly one hundred became professors, another one hundred ministers, and about the same number became lawyers or judges. Nearly sixty became doctors, and others were authors or editors.

There is an unwritten cultural bias against being a stay at home mom. It shouldn't be so. At the very least we can work to change that mindset in the body of Christ. Let us lift up her value, not over and against those who work, but just because it is so.

Pondering God with My Girls

The other night as Mackenzie and Kaitlann and I were reading the bible, as is our regular routine, there was a reference to Moses on the mountain with God in Exodus 33:20. This reference gave me a chance to remind them of the story of Moses being hidden in the cleft of the rock and God passing by because Moses asked to see His glory.  And, of course, as with most nights, then came the questions from a 7 & 9 year old.  They pondered who big the hand of God might be as he covered Moses.  They wondered what exactly was the "back of God" (hinder parts for you who memorized KJV), and what it looked like.  We didn't really talk about the glory of God and proclaiming his Name before Moses. They didn't ask, and I needed to get them to go to sleep sometime, so I didn't drop it in.  But then they asked about how no man can see the face of God and live.  They thought that was fine, then Mackenzie asked about Jesus. Could Jesus see the face of God (I think the passage we were reading mentioned this too, 2 Peter or 1 John maybe)?  My answer was that Jesus WAS God. She paused for a minute; it was dark (reading by the light of Kindle and iPhone), so I couldn't see her face, but she was thinking.  She asked about the passage we were reading, about God sending His Son or Jesus returning at God's command (again, can't remember, its been several days), and was implying that there was a necessary separation because of the text. "But I thought..."  "But this says..."

We have talked about the trinity before.  And I have done my best to explain it before.  Kaitlann had been lost in the discussion, but Mackenzie was again pondering it. And I didn't, and don't have the answers. Doctrines and thoughts about God like these, remind us that we cannot "explain" God. There are thoughts about God that as the Psalmist said, are too high for us, Psalm 139:6. Paul says it in Romans 11:33. It is good to plum the depths of the person of God. We don't do it enough.  Our thoughts are consumed with earthly things. Our patterns of thinking affect our desires as well. If our "awe" of God was higher, our desire for Him would be higher, and our satisfaction in Him would be fuller, and He would be glorified!

So I guess this is my exhortation to you today, think deep thoughts about Him. Get past the basics. No training required--no seminary degree, no church office, no denominational training, no years of teaching a bible study, just a brain. Fill that thing with scripture, and use it. If fact, the best way to do it is probably in groups of two or three. Search out the One True God in all His beauties and excellences and complexities, and you will be blessed.

Sabotaging the Generations 2

So I never got around to writing this second piece the day after the first, but the loss of the next generation is a big concern of mine. If we continue down the path of decline of the Christian faith in the American evangelical church among our children and youth, Christianity will not have much of a future in the next 40 years! Just a small disclaimer: even in perfect parenting there is no guarantee of faith, children are responsible for their lives/eternities. However, we may also bear the guilt if we do not afford them with good spiritual guidance through consistent practice of the faith. Nor does marrying believers guarantee good parenting and commitment to pass on the faith. For hypocrisy is probably more deadly than express unbelief to our children.

The second way that we are seeing the next generations of Christians sabotaged is the intermarriage of faith and non-faith (or nominal faith). God warns of this in Deut 7:3-4 "Nor shall you make marriages with them. You shall not give your daughter to their son, nor take their daughter for your son. For they will turn your sons away from following Me, to serve other gods; so the anger of the LORD will be aroused against you and destroy you suddenly." And we see this played out all through the Old Testament, just like God said.

Yet we ignore this truth and the warning given in 1 Corinthians that tells us not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. We have all seen it: a young man "falls in love" (that's a whole separate blog) with a girl that is not following Christ (she maybe have a profession, but is not living it, or maybe she is lost altogether), and it may happen slowly (over years), or quickly (over months), but sooner or later it is easier not to fight the battle with her, and he stops following Christ.

Even if he persists in his walk with Christ, they get married, and the kids can tell that mom really doesn't think that it is important, and regardless of what they are told (for she may be outwardly compliant), they see the truth, and it sinks in. And when they are of age, well they choose their own way...

And the same is true for young women who marry unspiritual men. Now, who wants their kids to reject Christ and go to hell? Nobody! But by mingling faith/non-faith, we are sabotaging them. How do we avoid this? Teach this in our churches, enforce in in our homes. Teach them that if they don't date people with weak or no faith, they won't marry them, and their kids (our grandchildren) will not die lost. Make them see that eternity is in the balance!

And of course the ramifications are much larger than your kids/grandchildren. What about their grandchildren and their grandchildren? Once the baton of faith has been dropped, the lostness in the family will grow exponentially with each generation. And so your decision to marry a lost man/woman could (I say could because God can do anything), cost you hundreds of souls...

So STOP IT! Put away the foreign boyfriends/girlfriends among you that cause you to worship foreign gods, and forsake the One True God! Do it for your children, grandchildren, and their grandchildren.

Thanks for reading,

Sabotaging the Generations 1

Didn't realize it had been so long since I blogged last. But I doubt you suffered any loss not hearing from me. Anyway...

Recently several times Erika and I have seen situations in lives that we fear are sabotaging the next generation of believers in "good" Christian's lives. Don't hear me saying that there is no hope for those who are reared in these situations, I am committed to the absolute sovereignty of God (including election), but God gives ample instruction and normal means of the preparation of hearts and awakening of spiritual desires. So I guess I share these two situations because of my burden for Christ's flock and their offspring and the Kingdom. Hear them, and share them in the form of a warning.

1) Inconsistent gathering. I know, I know, harping on being with the church again. What can I say, it's the preacher's job. But really, children (or grandchildren) of professing Christians easily interpret the message that gathering with God's people is of minimal importance and done only when convenient if there is no consistency in Dad/Mom's or grandparent's lives. They realize that the church is not that important, thus Christ is not important, therefore a waste of time. They see very little impact upon their family's lives from Christ, and will eventually abandon the faith. Even if they don't abandon the faith officially, they abandon it in their hearts, and express a greater hypocrisy than the preceding generation.

Certainly consistent church gathering will not ensure future faith of our children, and there are many other ways that consistent church gatherers can destroy infant faith, but it seems a simple obedience to follow (Heb 10:25) to aid our children's picture of real faith. Once the chain of faith is broken, think of how many children and grandchildren of otherwise well meaning Christians will end up among the goats that were appointed to eternal fire. Time and space would not permit me to elaborate on the other benefits of regular participation with the Body of Christ, but isn't the eternity of our children and the generations to follow worth our determined commitment?

"Therefore know that the LORD your God, He is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and mercy for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments" -Deut 7:9

Never got to number two, guess I will do that one tomorrow...

Thanks for reading!

Yearly Jones Family Update 2010

Every year we get these wonderful letters from people that we love that live far away that keep us up to date even though we are so far away, and don’t get to see them much. And every year we say that we should do that for those people too. So for the first time, here goes:

Erika and I were thinking just the other day, it seems like only last week we were moving in Rankin Court at Southeastern with Ross and Jill beginning life anew. And this year we celebrated 10 years together. In that time we have had two cross country moves, and added three kids, three cats, two dogs, and a fish to our little family. We wonder what we did with all our time before all these! And we still think about our NC and ME friends often, pray for them, and miss them tremendously.

2010 has been a great year for our growing family. In January God made a liar out of me when it snowed in south Georgia for the first time in about 15 years, after telling Mackenzie that it will never snow here in Georgia. I went back to Peru for the fourth time this year in March to minister the gospel in the Andes Mountains. Later in the spring my grandmother, Nana, went home to be with Jesus at 87 years old. She had a marvelous testimony, and I had the privilege, at her request, of preaching her funeral. One of our cats, Callie, had kittens this year about six weeks before Erika had Knox. This was a great experience for the girls, and of course we ended up keeping one, Cremecicle. He is a huge, long-haired, orange tom cat. We love him.

Of course all this time Erika is growing and growing as she (and the rest of us too) prepared for Knox’s arrival. This was a worrisome time for Erika and I as we felt the fear of the past two pregnancies that ended in miscarriage. But God was so faithful, and even after another battle with HELP syndrome/preeclampsia, and another emergency c-section, Knox came into this world in early July. Since his arrival, life is different around here, but more wonderful that we can imagine, even with not having a baby in the house in four years. He is another easy baby, and even with his severe acid reflux, he is growing, laughing and smiling often. And now at 5 months, he is up to 20 lbs. Both the girls are extremely helpful (most of the time) with Knox, and spoil him rotten, not letting him ever cry, and treating him like a little superstar!

Kaitlann, now almost 5 years old is our little cook. If Erika is doing just about anything in the kitchen, Kait is on the counter mixing and fixing with her. Kait is still skinny as a rail, and full of life. She is Daddy’s fearless roller coaster partner, and is finally tall enough to ride some good ones with me. She started homeschool this year, and is doing great with the curriculum, but still working on those ABC’s.

Mackenzie stands around and worries about Kait when we are up on a roller coaster, lol. She is growing too, up to about 70 lbs at almost 7 years old. She is doing great in school, reading well, doing math at a second grade level. She played soccer this year for the first time. This was our first experience with a team sport, and she had a ball! She was already calculating when the spring season would start once this one was over. She did really good after she worked through some timidity. She can hit a bulls eye at 100 yds with her new .243, but is a little shy of it because of the recoil.

Both the girls are growing in their knowledge of Christ, and our prayer is daily that they make a personal decision for Christ. Mackenzie seems close, but we are trying to be careful not to put pressure on her, and allow the Spirit to work. Our constant prayer is that not only that God saves them, but that He calls them into ministry and sends them to the ends of the earth. (At least that’s my prayer. That is the only way I can become an international missionary, because Erika will have to go with them if they go! Lol!) Both of the girls still love to put on their princess dresses and parade around. Both of them love to climb the pear trees in the back yard, ride their bikes on the dirt road, and go hunting with Daddy. They are both still doing gymnastics, although we are not sure how much longer we will continue to do that. They both love trips to see Nana/Papa in Millwood, and Grandmamma/Pop in TN; although they don’t like the car ride—“how much longer till we get there” 10K times. They are great friends!

Erika is 29 and holding. I guess that is the last birthday I will mention for her on one of these letters. She really has her hands full with three kids, homeschool, and all the other things around the house that she does that hold our world together. We would all be nuts without her. She maintains the family blog at http://growingupwithmackandkait.blogspot.com. She also continues to teach her Sunday School class at church. And through it all, she still looks like a supermodel!

I started trying to play the guitar a little this year. I can do a few songs now, and I play for the girls at night sometimes during our devotions before bed, but I am not really that good. I am still the chaplain at the Sheriff’s Office, still coaching baseball, no longer the moderator of our association, serving on the board at the pregnancy care center, blogging a little at http://readytospendandbespent.blogspot.com, and am working on being a church planting coach with the GBC.

We have navigated some difficult waters this year at New River. We have had budget cuts and lots of deaths in the church family. But again, God has been so faithful, and we know that in His sovereign goodness, He has greater plans through the difficulties. But all the while, we are seeing husbands and wives baptized together, churches planted in Peru and in Tifton (our plant that we worked with here in Tifton is hovering about 350 with some 60 professions of faith and 40 baptisms. God is truly at work here. We hope that 2011 holds great things for New River Baptist Church.

Our parents are still doing well. Erika’s folks moved back to Millwood, and began work on their new house there. Kimmy (Erika’s sister) and Brett have had Colt for more than a year now, and he is growing. Edward (Jason’s brother) and Martha and their three kids are stationed in Yuma, AZ, but will be moving this summer. Jennifer (Jason’s sister) is still working in CA at Death Valley National Park, but her and her husband’s, Andrew, heart is in Alaska, where they spent the summer and bought property for a future move. Jason’s cousin Burt has been in Afghanistan since Oct, please continue to pray for him and his family.

Christ is still the center of our family, and we will continue to pursue Him as our greatest, most satisfying Treasure in 2011. We trust that He has blessed you as much as He has us. Our cup truly overflows with His mercy toward us. Our prayer is that you too will know Him, love Him, worship Him, and pursue Him together with us; and that He would bless and keep you, and cause His face to shine upon you, and give you peace! May all that you do bring honor and glory to the One to whom it is all due!

May the Lamb receive the reward of His suffering in 2011,

Jason, Erika, Mackenzie, Kaitlann, and Knox

Personal and Parenting

God has been dealing with me about parenting lately. I have been feeling like I am not doing enough to lead my family to Christ for a long time, but only moderately convicted about it. Last week I felt like it was worse, and began to ask seriously introspective questions. Do my kids think that I think Christ is the awesomist (I realize this is not a word, just using the language that I would use to explain the concept to my kids) thing in the world? Do Erika and I communicate to them that the reason that we do most of what we do is because we love Christ? Is this really the case? Do I do what I do because I think Christ is the awesomist!

Then our Sunday School teacher was teaching this week on our union with Christ and how that crosses into many sphere's of our lives. And he was asking if we as parents are leading our kids to have a personal walk with Christ, and not only a corporate walk, and a family walk with Him? Wow! God just really convicted me that because I have really good, easy going, relatively obedient, and well-behaved children, that I am lax on my intentional efforts to ensure that my kids know Christ as the most worthy and valuable being in the universe, and long to be with Him, serve Him, and lay down their lives for Him.

And I know that if I fail at this (I realize theologically that my children's eternity does not rest entirely on me, but that I have enormous responsibilities to be faithful and diligent in this area, and God will use that in conversion), I will let down generations of my offspring and thousands more souls that they will affect, should the Lord tarry. I do not want to look back at my life in fifty years thinking that I had a great ministry, even raised great kids, but that their faith was not a sold-out, world-altering, sin-killing, generation-crossing passion for Jesus.

So I desire your prayers as I try to put the emphasis on the most important things...

$10,000

Our video camera probably doesn't work too well in the dark, but if it did, I would have won $10,000 on America's Funniest Home Videos. OK, so the baby wakes up about 4:15 am, and Erika passes him to me while she gets up to go fix a bottle. He starts crying, and wakes Mackenzie up. So she comes in, and I explain that mom is getting him a bottle, he is fine. So she decides that while she is up, she is going to use the restroom before going back to bed. Then she steps into our bathroom in our room, and about that time Erika comes back with the bottle. She says, "here, I gotta go really bad." And I couldn't resist. Her eyes were shot because she had just come from the light in the kitchen, so she was totally blind. Mackenzie had stood up to pull her pants up, and Erika brushed her face when she was turning around. A giant gasp, and a huge shriek went out, and then she came flying out of the bathroom trying to breathe. Mackenzie was laughing, I could barely sit up and feed the baby I was laughing so hard. Probably a good thing that Erika didn't knock Mackenzie out! Of course then she knew that I knew, so then I was in trouble. But it was so worth it! So we all laughed an went back to bed...

I hope that you can picture it in your mind, it was too funny! Too bad we didn't have it on video...

Unto me a son is given

As many of you know, Erika gave birth to our son, Knox on Friday July 9th. He will be two weeks old tomorrow. I don't have lots of the good pictures here on my office computer, so I am going to direct you to Erika's family blog, where you can see lots of pics!



Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; -Psalm 127:3-5



Thank you to all who prayed for us!
Jason

Christians and Halloween II

All I know is that this is definitely an issue where all the answers are not clear, and also that many parents think about. And that Lew and Matt need to get together and study Rom 14 together ;) . If I had know that this blog post was going to generate so many comments, I would have waited to respond to my parents until now, because the discussion has been interesting and helpful for the most part. I am simply going to post my response to this young couple. Some of you may think I am too harsh, and some will think I am too lax, but this is just where I come down. And I don't think to be a "good Christian" that you necessarily have to agree with me. Ultimately his is a matter of liberty that should be approached with thoughtfulness, biblical honesty, care for other brethren, and not flaunted or
legalized. I hope that it is helpful at some level.

Thanks for your email. That is a tough question. Let me say up front that the bible doesn’t speak specifically about Halloween. And that I don’t think there is necessarily a right or wrong answer, because of no explicit biblical prescription. And I do think that well-intentioned bible believing Christians can disagree on this, and will come down on both sides of the issue. I don’t think it is a hill to die on. That having been said, I do think that there on principles in the bible that can be helpful. And you will find lots of material on both sides on the internet, some good and some bad.

But I will tell you both what I think, and what Erika and I do. But the bottom line will be that you and Jason will have to talk it out and figure out the path that God would have you and your family on.

If it were solely up to me, I don’t think I would encourage my kids to participate. Obviously there are some dark overtones with a celebration of the undead. And the whole observance verges on occult practice and is devoid of anything godly. But much of the same can be said about Easter and Christmas. Do the research on those and you will find mostly pagan roots, and things unhelpful to biblical teaching. But we don’t completely jettison those holidays. And I don’t think that Satan is out more on that night than others, or anything weird like that. Some Christians go way overboard in my opinion.

Erika and I have mixed feelings about it all. We were both raised trick or treating, and it didn’t seem to do much damage. And I guess I don’t have the backbone, and Erika doesn’t have the heart to refuse to let them go out and get candy. So we participate, I guess. But like Christmas and Easter, we just emphasize the right things, and don’t make a big deal about it. We don’t encourage them to dress up in scary stuff. We don’t decorate the house or the yard with ghosts and black cats. We carve pumpkins, but we put crosses in them instead of faces. And in general we don’t make a big deal of it all. We let the kids dress up as princesses or musketeers, or pumpkins or whatever. At Christmas we don’t mention Santa much, but obviously it’s everywhere, and if the kids ask, we tell them the truth, but we make the focus of Christmas Jesus, and the same with the Easter bunny. But we don’t go overboard on getting them to disbelieve in Santa either. And we get them gifts for Christmas morning. And sometimes they ask, and we don’t lie, but don’t make a big deal of the non-Christian parts. It’s all in how you approach it.

If you all decided that your conviction was to keep your kids from Halloween, I think that would be fine. However, don’t harp on others who don’t feel that way. But if you feel the liberty to participate at some level, I definitely think that there are lines to be drawn and limits to set. I am not sure that this is an issue to fight over, but I do believe it is an issue to be thought through from a Christian standpoint. I may blog about it and see what kind of response I get.

I hope this helps, sorry I couldn’t give you more clear guidance. But I believe it is an area where we can rely on the Spirit, and do what we feel is best.

Blessings,

And just by the way, Lew wrote a very humorous blog post on Halloween that you will get a kick out of. You can read it here.

Thanks for reading...

Christians and Halloween I

As a pastor, it brings me great joy to know that people the church I serve are striving to know and live truth. And as one of their spiritual advisers, I get to help them make decisions about life and family and the faith (a responsibility that I do not take lightly, and am constantly amazed at how people listen to what I say).

So I get an email from a young family with small children this week that asks me what I think about Halloween; and should believers participate, if so, how much? This is a family that has been recently converted, baptized, and are now asking questions about their family life and their new faith. They have been doing some research on the internet, and realize that the opinions on this matter vary greatly.

But before I post my reply with my thoughts and convictions, I thought I would just give all of you a chance to chime in on the question. That's what blogging is about, right? The quicker, freer exchange of ideas? So, what do you think? Should Christians be involved in Halloween?

My Father's Day Present

Erika and the girls had this video done for me for Father's Day. What a great wife I have! Grab a tissue...

A Plea for Multi-Generational Parenting pt. 3

For my last post on this topic, I want to address two remaining issues. First of all relationships. If we are to pass on values and truth to the next generation, we must build and maintain relationships. Everyone thinks that they have a relationship with their children, but not every child thinks they have a genuine relationship with their parents. One of the best resources that I have seen on this topic was a message that Josh McDowell preached that the GA Baptist State Evangelism conference. You can order the message here. He shows the truth that if we don't maintain our close relationships with children and teens, they will not receive the truth that we teach (this is not ruling out the intervention of the Spirit, just stating truth). Truth is receive when its communicated in love. We must maintain intimacy with our children and teens, knowing them, relating to them, and serving them, else they will view the truth we teach as falsehood. This not only applies to our own families, but to those within the body of Christ that we minister to. And those in the community (assuming that you are ministering in the community). We must have closeness, vulnerability, honesty, love, and genuine commitment to them, BEFORE they will hear our truth. We must reduce judgmentalism and get involved in their world.

Secondly, we must personally sell out for Christ. Half-hearted Christian commitment will ensure apostasy in our own families, churches, and denominations. Nominal faith in one generation is no faith in the one that comes after it. According to Voddie Baucham it takes two Christian families with two kids a piece to get one believer into the next generation (it's not rocket science with a 75% defection rate). The younger generations see right through the hypocrisy that got by us. And they don't want that Christ, or at least not His church. McDowell says that never before in the history of the church has a hypocritical parent or church member been such a hindrance to the preaching of the word. If Christ is not everything to us all week long, all month long, all year long, our children will understand the shallowness of our commitment, and reject our gospel.

Strive to be the parent or parental figure that inspires legends about your godliness. Refuse to be a status quo, maintenance mentality, don't rock the boat believer. Let your testimony of your passion for Christ be evident. Pray that your family will be speaking of this great grandfather or grandmother who loved Jesus more than life itself. Pray that they will be aspiring to be like you. Pray that they will tell of your accomplishments for the kingdom for generations. THEN, GIVE THEM SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT! Live radical for Jesus! Quit making excuses! Cut off the hands and gouge out the eyes that prevent you from living a legendary life and raising up Christian ballistic missiles! Live your faith out loud! May the dust of your Rabbi be all over you! And if so, may your tribe increase to the glory of God and the ingathering of the nations!