Monday, July 20, 2009

My Heart Strangely Warmed

Many of you remember our situation a few months ago with our surprise ectopic pregnancy. If not, you can read about it here. And after than experience, Erika and I decided that we would have another baby. We had been kinda talking about it some anyway, and it seemed like a good time for it. And many of you shared our joy with us as we filled everyone in on the child that the Lord blessed us with, due in this spring.

Well today our hearts were broken again by the confirmation by the doctors of a miscarriage. Our hopes were so high, and they now seemed to be taken away. But we know that our lives, and children's lives (born and unborn) are in the hands of an All-Wise, All-Loving Master. And we seek refuge now in Him. For His Name is a strong and mighty tower, and His mercies are new every morning. He is our joy and sufficiency, and our portion forever. But of course, our pain is deep.

But as I reflect on it all, one blessing (well, actually several) stands out. We probably jumped the gun a little bit, making it public that we were pregnant. But we don't keep secrets well, and when you tell your 5-year old, everyone is going to know soon enough, so we didn't wait. And of course, it seems like that doubles the pain. BUT, that is the strange thing. Now, we don't have to hide our pain. It is so easy to try to hide what is going on inside for a myriad of reasons from the people whom God has given us to lean upon--His bride, the church. And because so many of you knew of our joy, and now our pain, the outpouring of support has been tremendous! We have been so blessed with so many friends, that even though we don't see much, still care very deeply for us. And it seems to have made the pain more bearable, and the burden lighter.

So I thank God for all of you who have called, emailed, texted, and facebooked (is that a word?) and voiced your concern for us. I doubly thank those of you who have taken the time to go to the throne of grace on our behalf, for we are in much debt to you. With the Apostle I hope that by grace we will be able to rejoice in our sufferings so that when we are weak, He is displayed as strong. For His grace is sufficient for us. And you have been used as a means to get us through. I am sure there will be more sad days ahead for us, but pray that God will gain glory as we endure them as good soldiers and witnesses of Christ. May God be honored by our lives through this situation. Thanks again, you labor for the Lord is not in vain!

1 comment:

  1. May the Lord bless your family in a mighty and Holy way. After 14 years of desperately trying to have a baby, God blessed us. The doctors had told us that she would never carry full-term. We debated whether or not to tell people and after about 10 seconds of thinking about it, we told everyone. We figured that even if we were to lose the baby, at least we were able to share in the joy of that life...even if it was brief. Thankfully, we will be celebrating her fourth birthday next month. I said that to not make you feel badly, but to say 'thank you'. Thank you for allowing us, outside of your family, to celebrate the joy of another soul being created. While we may not meet that child in this life...we will in the next and what a reunion that will be for you and your family, and by proxy, us also. We are praying for you and we love you.